Percy's Idea of a Problem
by l1fewriter
Summary: Annabeth is having a relaxed, monster-free day before Percy runs into her. And he has a problem.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson**

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The ice clinked in my glass as I swirled it contemplatively, gazing down at the drafting papers spread out all over the table. I was enjoying a rare moment of quiet. Others might not believe so. The cafe I was in was always buzzing with conversation- girls sitting around cradling coffees, loudly gossiping about each other's boyfriends, little kids with their parents, begging for another donut, guys arguing about football.

Most adults never came in here. They claimed it was always noisy, crowded, altogether uninhabitable. I didn't care. It didn't have bloodthirsty monsters. And, for once, I wasn't being chased by bloodthirsty monsters. Or helping others (ahem, _Percy_) get away from bloodthirsty monsters. Bloodthirsty monsters were always intent on ruining my day. And the rest of my life if they could get away with it.

"You know, I think it's a sin to be happy while doing homework." I glanced up, not at all surprised to see a brunette leaning on the end of my table. Alex was in almost all my classes- the deceptively smart one who managed to ace tests, frequent cafes, and still find the time to tell me every five minutes to go find a guy to date (even though I had told her on multiple occasions that I had a boyfriend. She didn't believe that Percy existed.)

"Hi, Alex." I said cheerfully.

We got along fairly well, actually. People believed I had no life and I believed they had no brain. Alex was the exception to this rule. "I can't believe you're doing this now." Alex commented, plucking a french fry from my quickly diminishing pile.

I rubbed out a pencil line, shrugging off her words easily. "Have to do it at some point." Then I had to grab her wrist to stop her from stealing _another_ fry. "And stop eating my food."

She raised her eyebrows. "Look, Annie, that isn't due for, like, a month. Just let me drag you away from your precious work for _five seconds_ so I can go find you a guy." Her eyes lit up suddenly. Bad sign. "Oh, there's this thing tonight and I think-"

"Alex." I cut off her babbling with a tone that brooked no argument. "First. My name is not Annie. Ever. And second, I _have _a boyfriend."

"Come on," Here she paused and said my name with much more emphasis than normal. "_Annabeth_. He isn't real. Just admit it." She twirled a lock of hair around her finger, grinning as I rolled my eyes.

"Alex, I'm not having this conversation. Again. I," I tilted my chin up and tapped the pencil end on a blank piece of drafting paper. "Am working."

That was when the door to the cafe exploded open.

Okay, not literally. It did not fly into hundreds of shards of wood and glass and land in coffee cups (which, yes, has happened to me). But it did smack into the opposite wall with an earth-shattering crash.

Looked like free-time was over.

With a sigh, I scooped my papers into a semi-organized heap and tucked them into my bag. "Oh my God, he's cute." Alex's breathless voice whispered into my ear. "You think he's single?"

I scooped up the last of the french fries before she could get to them, saying exasperatedly, "Alex, I have a boyfriend. How many times do I have to say-" As I glanced up, I found myself staring at a very familiar figure (currently trying to figure out how to get past the overbearing waitress). "Anyway," I said with a slight smirk. "He's not single."

Alex's jaw dropped. "How do you know?"

The guy looked up and caught sight of me. He dodged the waitress and her formidable stack of menus and skidded to a stop in front of my table. "Wise Girl." He panted. It looked as if he had run a mile to get here.

"Seaweed Brain." I countered, slinging the bag over my shoulder. "What kind of trouble have you gotten into now?" I looked him over critically. "Did you crash Paul's car again?"

"That was not my fault!" He yelped, dragging his hands through his hair. "Party ponies and cars just don't mix well. And besides. This is worse."

Oh gods.

What had my idiot of a boyfriend gotten into now?

Almost unconsciously, I started flicking through scenarios. If he had annoyed Artemis again, we would all be in for a very long day. Because no matter how cute jackalope-Percy was, I did not wish a repeat of that particular week. Jackalope-Percy was very hard to keep out of a zoo. Although, to be fair, human-Percy was almost as bad.

"Worse?" I asked cautiously.

"Sorry to interrupt the party," Alex said. "But _who_ are you?"

Percy glanced next to him, as if he just realized that there were other people in the cafe. Alex had crossed her arms, disgruntled, but also looking vaguely shocked at the abrupt appearance of a random guy. "Oh. Right. Introductions." I said hastily. "Percy, this is Alex. Classmate." I added, because Percy was looking at her curiously. "Alex, Percy. My _boyfriend_." I added, a tad bit more viciously than perhaps necessary.

"He exists." She said blankly. "He actually exists."

Percy blinked.

"Anyway." I decided to stop this conversation before I was embarrassed beyond belief. "Percy. What are you freaking out about?"

Percy came back to earth. "Oh. _Oh_. Worst thing that could _ever_ happen to me! And I _mean_ ever. I," he paused and took a deep breath. I braced myself. "Have a physics test."

**Do people think I should expand this or leave it as a one-shot? Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson**

**Huge thank you to everyone reading and everyone following, alerting and reviewing! You're all awesome!**

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Studying with Percy was….

Well, I should've known better. I _really_ should've known better.

I showed up at his house fifteen minutes later, bag loaded with my notes and textbooks (because he was banned from my school for an incident involving a stapler, swivel chair, about fifty assorted monsters, and a blueberry milkshake. Long story).

Percy opened the door and my first thought was, _Holy Athena, how does he live here?_ "Um, Percy, is your house under quarantine yet?"

He blinked at me. "No, why?"

"Because I just lost a large amount of faith in the health department. Gods, do you _ever_ vacuum? No, wait, that would require the floor being present." I leant against the door frame, already tired and quite afraid of entering the death trap that was Percy's home.

He shrugged. "Mom's been staying over at Paul's for a bit."

"How long is a bit? A month?" Cautiously, I hooked a foot under a couch pillow and flicked it back to the actual couch.

"Um, two days?" Percy scratched the back of his head. He looked bewildered.

"Two days and your apartment turns into…" Even after a full minute, I couldn't find a word potent enough to describe the state of the apartment. "Maybe we should, um, study outside?"

"Why?"

And I wondered how this boy was failing classes.

"Because your apartment looks like… a toxic dump?"

"It does?" Percy turned around to survey his living room with a frown.

"Percy," I groaned, exasperated. "There is not a single square inch of clear floor, it looks like the leftovers of about fifty dinners are spread over that coffee table- to be honest, I'm scared to look in the kitchen- and I don't even _want _to know what that blue stuff on the ceiling is."

"Oh." He glanced up towards the blue spot in question that was currently dripping into a plate that with half-eaten pizza. "The blender and I didn't get along."

At that moment, I seriously considered running in the opposite direction as fast as humanly possible.

"Right." I decided. "We," I took hold of my boyfriend's wrist. "are going out."

Fifteen Minutes Later….

"So, Newton had three laws of motion- Percy would you _please_ stop stabbing the dirt? Honestly, what's it done to you?" We were sitting on a park bench, studying. Or, in my case, teaching, and in Percy's case, ignoring.

"It exists." Percy said moodily, uncapping his pen and adding a new mark to all the others.

"Percy, you asked me to help you study." I said for about the hundredth time. "It would probably help if you _listened."_

He groaned. "Bad idea."

"Failing physics would be worse."

"How do you know? You get a perfect score on pretty much every test you take!"

"Because I do this thing called studying." I explained not-so-patiently.

"Studying." He groaned again. "Right." Percy tilted his head all the way back to stare at the sky. "I really don't like studying."

"So I've noticed." I muttered.

Half Hour Later….

"She's an empousa, I swear."

"Percy."

"Just look! She practically radiates evil."

"Percy, a baby carriage does not constitute as evil."

"But, but-"

"Percy. Physics. Failing. Focus."

"She's going to eat us and I'm going to blame you."

"She won't be _able_ to eat you, because I'll have killed you first."

"Annabeth, she's a monster."

"Percy, you have a physics test."

Percy ran a hand through his dark hair, deliberating for a few moments whether or not it was really worth arguing about it. "Fine. I'm studying. Yay."

That was when the woman's leg changed from flesh to metal.

"Told you she was an empousa."

An Hour Later….

"You're an idiot." I wheezed out, clutching my side.

"I didn't know she had practically a whole army in the bushes-!" Percy was bent double, breathing hard.

"So you yell 'charge!' and run towards the gigantic horde of bloodthirsty monsters. Yeah, _real _logical, Seaweed Brain."

"That's why I'm studying, right? To get smarter?" Percy tried, leaning heavily against the wall.

"There's this amazing thing that humans usually possess. It's called common sense."

"Oh."

We sighed simultaneously. I sank down onto the chair outside the restaurant. Percy followed.

"Hey, at least you got your physics notes, right?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. The physics notes were clutched to my chest, the backpack slung over a shoulder, tugging at my hair. Not exactly in the best of shape. "Yeah, but we have a bigger problem."

"We do?" Percy said tentatively, reaching for his pocket.

"You forgot your brain."

"Ooh. Low blow, Wise Girl."

Two hours later….

"So the apple guy-"

"You mean Newton, Percy." I corrected wearily, holding my head up with my hands.

"Yeah, him. He found out about gravity and he has these law things-"

I put my forehead down on the table, resisting the urge to bang it repeatedly.

"Um, Annabeth?" Percy said cautiously.

"Law things?" I said desperately to the table. "Even _I_ can't have karma this bad."

Three hours later….

"I have one question." I announced as Percy began doodling fish on my physics notes.

He glanced up, a thought line wrinkling his brow. "How many stripes does Nemo have?"

"Three. But Percy-"

"Right." Percy tapped the pencil on his chin, before carefully drawing in the stripes with utmost concentration.

"Did you learn _anything _today?" I burst out, throwing my hands up in the air.

Percy studiously began shading in the clown fish. "Yep."

I raised my eyebrows. "Uh-huh. And that would be…"

He grinned and held up the paper. "That Nemo has three stripes."

Four hours later….

"Annabeth?"

"Yes?" I didn't look up from the papers spread over the table.

"I'm going to murder myself if I have to learn one more formula."

I shrugged. "Look on the bright side. Then you won't have to take the test."

"Right!" Percy grinned, suddenly quite happy.

"I don't recommend it." I added quickly.

Percy sighed and slumped back onto the table. "Honestly, next time I meet a monster, I'll just shout science at them. So boring they'll be dead within minutes."

"And that is why you are not in charge of strategy when we play Capture the Flag."

He huffed and crossed his arms, looking like a sulky teenage girl. "Are we done studying?"

I glanced over him critically. "Did we ever actually start?"

Percy's mouth fell open. "Are you serious?"

"I'm serious about the fact that my notes look like the animators from _Finding Nemo_ decided to use them as drafting paper."

This had the opposite fact. "You think the drawings are that good?" Percy asked, grinning.

"Nemo looks like a sideways eight." I said bluntly.

Seaweed Brain put a hand over his heart, like I'd mortally wounded him. Then he dropped it and said cheerfully, "So are we done?"

I rolled my eyes. "Fine! Yes, we're done!"

"_Yes!"_ Percy jumped up with a fist pump and began dancing around like a maniac.

"Go home, Percy." I sighed. "Sleep, eat a good breakfast and for gods' sake, clean that apartment of yours."

He grinned. "Love you too, Wise Girl."

**I'm probably going to make this a three-shot and leave it at that, but I'm not really sure what to write in a third chapter, so ideas are very welcome...**

**Please review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson. And I am not dead.**

**Sorry for letting this go so long! (Please don't kill me) Thanks to everyone who reviewed and for the ideas! **

**Credit for this idea goes to qui11 (I know it's not exactly what you asked for, but it gave me enough inspiration to get started)**

Alex was driving me crazy. Not in the "okay, this is exasperating, but I can deal with it" kind of way. Not in the "gods, this girl won't stop talking, just tune her out" kind of way. Not even in the "I'm going to brain her from behind and tape her mouth shut and then throw her out the window" kind of way.

No, in the "I'm going to kill her, rip out her entrails, and feed them to the Furies" kind of way. Which, if I were to be honest, was one of the less vivid ways I had imagine killing her.

Why? Because of a single, insistent fact: the girl would not _shut up_.

Ever since I had walked into the dorm about two hours ago, there had been non-stop talking. It had started with, "He exists. I can't believe he actually exists." From there, it had progressed to, "Oh my God, I bet he has a six pack. Does he have a six pack? He looks like a guy who would have a six pack." And then to, "I can't believe you didn't introduce me earlier. If it was me, I would've taken a picture and blown it up all the way and print it out as a poster and then when people came in and were asking what actor that was, I'd be like _actor? I think you mean boyfriend_ and then laugh like crazy…"

_I should never have said he was my boyfriend._

Alex poked her head out of my dorm room door and yelled down the hall, "Hey, guys! I met Annabeth's boyfriend!"

_And what a wonderful way to ruin the day…_ I reflected as multiple heads appeared at their door.

And then my day went completely downhill.

Teenage girls flooded into my room and perched on my desk, my bed, sat cross-legged on the floor, leaned against the wall; they were like overgrown children waiting for story time. And Alex indulged them. "Okay, so, we were at this cafe and he just came barreling through the door and oh my _God_, he is-"

_Should've said I was tutoring him._

"And they were so _cute _together, it's like-"

_Or that he's my five-times removed cousin. Which, actually, isn't that far off. Which is sort of disgusting._

"And he had a physics test which is sort of non-romantic, but, whatever-"

_Evil stepfather. Window washer. Random homeless guy. _

"And she was off studying with him the whole afternoon-"

_Vampire. No, that would have been worse…. Can't imagine how I would hold up under all the "sparkly" questions._

"And she won't say anything else about him, and I don't even know his last name-"

_My brother. Ew, no._

"So obviously I've been asking about him all day, but-"

_Groan. And yes, I reserve the right to groan inside my head._

A day later:

Percy looked so peaceful sitting in the sand that I almost didn't want to disturb him. Then I remembered the mob of gossiping teenagers and any reservation I might've had vanished.

He was sitting with his back to me, his dark hair ruffling slightly in the breeze, staring out at the crashing waves. The middle of winter and he still sits out by the beach and its freezing waters in little more than a windbreaker. Not sure whether that shows extreme stubbornness or extreme stupidity. Knowing Percy, it's probably a combination of the two.

Then I snuck up behind him and dumped a handful of sand over his head.

I have to admit- it was quite satisfying.

Percy yelled and jumped up, shaking his head like a wet dog. The sand particles flew from his hair in all directions. Yup. Demigod entertainment at its best. "What was _that_ for?" he yelped.

"Because," I explained, plopping down in the sand next to him, "my room is currently infested with annoying teenage girls who have high hopes of meeting my elusive boyfriend."

Percy blinked. "English please?"

I rolled my eyes. "You made my life horrible." I said succinctly.

He scratched his head. When he pulled his hand away, there was sand underneath his nails. Petty vengeance makes me much more happy than it should. "Right. I'm going to pretend I understand."

"Just understand that I am not happy with you right now."

He grinned. "Yeah. Cause that's so different from usual."

"This time I'm actually serious." I snapped. "There are girls all over the place demanding details, even though I've been telling them for _months_ that you exist, and Alex is bothering me nonstop, and I'm getting _no_ work done, and that doesn't really matter, since I've finished all projects due for at least a month, but that doesn't mean anything, and don't bother telling me that I'm a nerd, and-" I paused for breath, while simultaneously trying to think of more things to complain about.

That was when I realized that Percy had given up trying to decipher my torrent of words and instead was absentmindedly drawing Dory in the sand. Since when was my boyfriend so obsessed with Finding Nemo?

"Right." He answered vaguely. Then he looked up, suddenly bright-eyed. "Hey, do you know-"

"I don't know how many stripes Dory has, Percy." I sighed wearily.

"That wasn't what I was going to say." Percy actually sounded offended. "I was _going_ to tell you that I took my physics test today."

He paused dramatically. I sort've killed the mood though, when I muttered, "yeah, helped you study for it, remember? Worst. Decision. Ever."

He ignored me. "I think I actually did well!" He grinned- that crooked, endearing smile- and it made my grudge soften.

But only a little bit.

"So am I still hated?" Percy asked hopefully.

"My hate for you is so complete, it's not even funny." I told him tonelessly.

Percy gave me the puppy dog eyes. Gods, it's_ impossible _to say no to the puppy dog eyes.

I averted my gaze. _Resist; come on, you can do it. _"Still hate you."

"Awww." Percy turned his puppy dog eyes away. Then he sighed and waited for the tirade.

And he got one.

"Do you know what I had to do to get away from them?" I demanded.

He shrugged. "Jump out the window?"

"That actually was a part of it." I admitted.

Percy blinked. "You actually... jumped out a window?"

"Invisible." I clarified. "Which is actually really hard."

Percy almost looked afraid to ask.

"Depth perception is hard without being able to see your body." I told him anyway.

He nodded slowly. "Riiiiight."

"I had to tell them that I was going to the bathroom."

"Where you jumped out the window." Percy said.

"Yup. And hid in a twenty-four hour Dunkin Donuts, completely caffeinated on about six cups of coffee."

"I thought you hated chain restaurants." Percy commented.

"Yeah, well, I couldn't sleep in my cafe. Don't judge." I informed him crossly.

"Why not?"

"Cause they went on a manhunt for me. All that was missing was the pitchforks."

Percy blew out a long breath and stared at me. "And I thought most of our friends were crazy."

"Oh no, we're perfectly sane. Teenagers on the rampage for gossip on the other hand? They're a different story."

"I think I passed physics though," He gave me a hopeful half smile. "That's got to count for something, right?"

"How're you doing in pre-calc?"

He winced.

"Never mind."

"But tomorrow I'll get my grade-"

"Don't call if you fail-"

"Oh, and Mom comes back," he added as an afterthought.

It was my turn to wince. "Please tell me you cleaned up."

He turned to me with a bewildered gaze. "What? Why?"

"You're on your own for that one." I muttered.

Percy shrugged and turned back to watch the sea.

I leaned into his side, resting my head against his shoulder and watched the waves too. Very calming...

"Hey, Seaweed Brain?" I murmured sleepily.

"Yeah, Wise Girl?"

"I'm going to fall asleep."

Percy blinked at me. Then he smiled. "Go ahead. I'll take you back to your dorm-"

"No, your apartment. They're probably still in my dorm. Like vultures." I yawned widely.

"Okay."

"And don't put me in the living room. It's toxic."

"Okay."

"And wake me up before your mom comes home."

"Okay."

"Cause there's going to be an explosion."

"Okay."

"And I'm _not_ helping you clean up that house."

"Okay."

Having finally run out of things to reprimand Percy with, I let my eyes slip shut.

**Only an epilogue left... which I hopefully will upload in less than a month...**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own Percy Jackson. Never have, never will...**

**So look! I actually updated within a week! Amazing!**

**This is final chapter, so enjoy!**

The first thing I saw on waking up was a bright blue ceiling. It could be described as neon, actually. I had no idea the color blue could _be_ that obnoxious. The second thing I saw was a certain boyfriend sprawled out on the floor, snoring loud enough to wake the dead. Nico would not approve. That was his job.

Percy's room had not escaped the inevitable mess that seems to just appear wherever my boyfriend goes, but it didn't actually smell. Although that may have had to do with the multiple cans of febreeze scattered about the room. Probably put there by one Sally Jackson. Smart lady.

"Percy?" I called, swinging my legs over the side of the bed. "Wake up?"

Percy made some odd noise that one would normally associate with a cow. Not the response I was hoping for.

"Seaweed Brain."

That time I didn't even get the cow noise. Feeling vaguely insulted, I slipped off the bed and padded over to my brainless boyfriend. Dropping into a crouch by his head, I shouted as loudly as possible, "WAKE UP!"

Nothing.

It is official.

My boyfriend could sleep through the zombie apocalypse, wake up, and wonder why there were half-eaten corpses scattered in the lobby downstairs.

With a shrug, I rose and stretched. If Percy couldn't wake up, that was his problem.

"Where does one find breakfast in a toxic dump?" I mused aloud, picking carefully through the chaos defined as a room.

Percy sat up. "Breakfast?"

I stared at him.

Boyfriends are weird.

It was only a few moments later that Percy and I were sitting at his kitchen counter with some pitiful cereal. The contents of the kitchen counter had been shoved over rather ruthlessly to make room for our breakfast. If one kept their eyes firmly on their shoes, the room was habitable.

"So, you get your grade back yet?" I asked cautiously.

Through a mouthful of cereal, Percy grinned. "Yeah." He rifled around in his back pocket for a moment, before producing a paper that appeared to be folded into a star. Origami. Another thing I'd have to add to the "Percy Is Odd" list.

"You folded your test paper into a star." I stated.

"Yeah, so?" Percy rolled his eyes as if the normal person always turned their test papers into bad origami.

I shrugged and took the paper, unfolding it carefully.

My mouth dropped open. "Percy, you got a _94?_"

Percy rubbed the back of his head modestly. "She took off points for me calling Newton the apple dude and yeah, I got a few wrong, but-"

I cut him off with a very un-Annabeth squeal. "You passed!"

Percy grinned. I grinned back.

Then the door to his apartment creaked open. "_Perseus Jackson!_"

We winced simultaneously.

"I think your mom's home." I whispered.

"Yeah."

"Told you you should've cleaned up." I added.

"Yeah." Percy was watching the kitchen door like someone was about to burst in with a machine gun.

"Bye then!" I pecked him on the cheek and turned invisible.

"_Annabeth, you can't do this to me!_" He yelped in sheer horror.

"Bye Kelp Head!" I called cheerfully as I vaulted the window to the fire escape.

"See you in the Underworld." Percy said gloomily.

If Percy had still been listening, he would have heard the faint sound of a laugh, carried by the wind over the city of Manhattan.

And that's how Percy both passed a physics test and was brutally murdered by his mother a day later. Okay, not really. More like enslaved to scrub the entire house down with a toothbrush and interrogated about unidentified blue spots on the ceiling.

**So it's finally over (even though it was only four chapters...)**

**Review!**


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